Travis and Loretta had a great marriage. Travis made sure to take the time to give her, a good listening to, frequently. Whether he followed through on what was said are not, was not as important as taking the time to hear what she was saying. (Successful Marriage Theorem #1) She was the conductor of the rhythm band; born to the job you might say. Travis was quite happy with his triangle. A match made in heaven.
Travis was a hard worker and very smart. There were no building techniques he didn’t understand and he added his innovations to the tasks at hand. As his skills grew, so did his income and stature in the community. He was an artisan. He was also a father. Loretta gave him a son early in their marriage. A son he adored. The boy, Trevor was smart and mechanically inclined just like his Dad. He became a mechanical engineer in college and got a job designing oil-field tools. Trevor could talk shop with his boy 24 hours a day if he had the chance. This young man was proof that Loretta and he were going to leave the world a little bit better place.
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“Life is a banquet and most poor bastards are starving to death!”
Auntie Mame
Trevor grew up watching his mother, as did his dad, as she ate at the banquet table. It was a feeding frenzy, there was nothing about life that she didn’t heartily consume. Colors, music, friends, laughter, jokes, and more good friends were her gluttony. Her husband and son felt privileged to be in the audience.
Nothing was too difficult for Loretta. Even being a Mother was a snap as far as she was concerned. As soon as Trevor was old enough to pour milk over cereal, la voila, she no longer made breakfast. When he was big enough to make a sandwich. Lunch is out of the way. As he grew older more and more responsibilities fell his way. Cleaning his room and laundry, are all mandatory. When he was first given the chore to clean up his room and keep it clean. He complained that she needed to help him, it was just too much to do alone. She said, “Trevor, this is your responsibility. Remember, there is no team in I.”
School? Less-than-perfect grades weren’t allowed. He just wasn’t given a choice. Bad grades meant staying at home to study. All privileges came after schoolwork was finished.
She was insistent that he didn’t use any four-letter words. She said. “Those kinds of words just reflect a limited vocabulary”. When she dropped a glass in the sink and broke it. She said, “Shit!”
Trevor said, “I thought words like that reflected a lack of vocabulary.”
“There are times when I like to use a full palette when painting a picture.” She said. He wasn’t going to win an argument.
His life wasn’t horrible. Organized sports, dating, and plenty of friends made up his life. When playing basketball or baseball. He could always hear his Mom above the rest of the crowd cheering him on. “Oh, did you see that? That’s my boy out there. Come on Trevor.” At first, it embarrassed him. After a while, it dawned on him that everyone knew his Mom and understood. He did everything he was supposed to do and never could figure out how she did it. She easily maneuvered him into doing what she wanted.
After college and at his first job, he came home for his first visit as a working man. At breakfast, one that he cooked, he was talking with Loretta. He proceeded to tell her all of the things she did wrong raising him. He used examples of his friends’ life with their mothers and how they differed. The fact that he went to school on an academic scholarship, was frugal with his money and had lots of friends wasn’t factored into his perception of his life. A different understanding of his life would come later.
She listened to him attentively. In the end, she smiled and said, “That is the most wonderful news I could ever hope for.”
“Mom! How can you say that? I just told you all of the things you did wrong raising me,” he said.
“You know, as a Mother, there were so many things I worried about. Was I right when I did this or that? Is there something more I should do? Will he be a good man like his Father? Now that you can see and recognize what I did wrong. You can fix it yourself. The little ship your Dad and I built won’t sink in the harbor. It will sail the seven seas.”
She stood up and kissed him on the cheek and said, “I am so proud of you.”